Like this:

He’s done it – again. I am out of words to describe my astonishment that humm3L can still live with himself after having had dozens of big announcements of teams that were going to own everything which then parted ways after only a few weeks. Well, here he is again. With the name AuxiliA (Wow, how intellectual. A latin name with a Roman picture attached to it. They’re probably trying to follow the big example of modus operandi who thought that having latin names for their team and their movies was super duper cool.) he has picked up a new sponsor who once again is supposed to make up for the fact that the team itself could not be any less interesting. The German web page spickmich.de has stepped up and decided to waste their money on a team that is not going to achieve anything.

The interesting part is that the web page seems to be about teachers. Oh, the irony. Has any of the members of that team even been to a proper school? They all posted their picture and together they look like the joke version of D12:

humm3L, who claims that it was his achievement that the team attended CPC2 – probably he’s responsible for the dismal performance there as well. He supplies the bad looks and the sub standard English.

wEAK, who has that certain “I’m going to cut myself if you’re mean to me” (I have always wondered why they say things like that, since it would only encourage me to treat them badly.) look on his face. He’s the pet of the family apparently.

gerumba, who’s supposed to beat everyone up while being on cocaine (Thanks to all those who translated that for me!). It is always good to have a secret super weapon in the team.

fLiXX, whose picture looks exactly like that of a mass murderer, the kind where women think “Oh, what a gentle guy” right before they’re being tied to a pole and have their throats slit open.

fireBall, who’s finally reunited with his lover humm3L (ET-Truth reported). He has claimed that he wants to head butt at least ten people at the next LAN event.

haZer, who is “the best rifle in Germany” – excuse me for a second, I’m going to “rofl” as the cool kids would say.

kuraigu, who has thought about moving to the Bronx but has not yet managed to book a flight, so he remains the sorry excuse for a pimp of the team.

faux, who is “probably one of the unknown players” – right you are there, who the fuck is he?

As usual, the team wants to compete in every possible cup and attend every possible LAN. Probably this time everything is going to be different, right? We’re forced to care every time and then we should care again when the team changes again next week. humm3L, really. You’re 22, you have been playing ET for a long time now and you’ve won shit, how about you stop that madness and get a job and a girl-friend? Or if that is too hard, at least don’t annoy us with your announcements anymore? Pretty please, with a cherry on top? That would be so great.